In the world of witty banter and sharp comebacks, humor often takes center stage. We’ve all been there—received an insult so clever and unexpected, that it’s impossible not to chuckle.
From quick-witted retorts and brutally honest snubs to unintended but devastating jabs, these are the funniest insults people have ever received and then shared on social media. Get ready to laugh out loud!
McBreeches
We all know those enthusiastic people who are into historical reenactments and period costumes. But normally we don’t see them in regular places like the subway, the bank, or our go-to fast food outlets.
It better be a really good Mc Flurry for it to be worth waiting more than 200 years of standing in line at a Mickey D’s.
Learning a Lesson
Becoming new parents is always an exciting time, and it’s not surprising that most dads-to-be are keen to share their wisdom with their new offspring. At the same time, our own parents often want to share pearls of wisdom to help us along the way.
But this guy’s dad went straight for the jugular with this comeback. We hope the OP has a more loving relationship with his baby when it arrives.
Ice Queen
Being a parent is the hardest job and sometimes you just need to make things a little easier for yourself any way you can.
This mom decided to give herself a break from cooking every night by buying a few frozen dinners, but her daughter wasn’t having any of it. Just wait ‘til she grows up and has kids of her own—then she’ll understand.
Gym Buddies
Going to the gym with someone else is an amazing way to motivate each other and enjoy working out together. This couple went to the gym together for six months which is a great achievement.
However, someone on the internet decided to trash this guy’s gains. Yes, the girl may look more athletic after her new exercise regime, but working out isn’t all about weight loss.
Not Your (Pay)Pal
There’s nothing more frustrating than dealing with a virtual agent when trying to solve a problem with a company. All you want to do is talk to a real person and you’re faced with a robot following a script.
This PayPal virtual assistant clearly needs some finetuning if this is its response when someone wants help after they’ve been scammed. We don’t like our chances in the robot apocalypse if this is how sassy they are.
Now, That’s Rejection
Families usually have one parent who does the lion’s share of the cooking. When that parent is out of town, it can be hard for the other one to step up to the plate and put food on the table.
This parent tried to cater to their kids’ culinary needs, but found out they would rather starve than eat their cooking. Ouch.
Dad Jokes
There are so many things to unpack in this exchange. First of all, why doesn’t this dad have his son’s number saved on his phone? Secondly, how many kids does he have because it sounds like he’s losing track?
This is the harshest rejection of a sweet request we’ve ever seen. Don’t worry, Albert, you’re better off without this poor excuse for a dad.
Reddit Roast
Reddit is like the Wild West of the internet and it’s not unusual for people to get into disagreements and start throwing shade. But, we’ve never seen a comment like this before.
Not only is responding to such a nice, encouraging comment with a snobby put-down not classy, but they even got their emojis and their emoticons mixed up. Luckily, the OP had an amazing comeback up their sleeve.
Monkey-ing Around
To be honest, orangutans are so adorable that we don’t really see the insult here. This dad has tried to suggest that his daughter was a hairy little ape when she was born, but let’s be real, human babies are not that different from orangutan babies.
Plus, he’s also comparing himself to an ape so it’s really insulting them both. Nice try, but this is much more cute than cold.
Fame Isn’t Everything
Lots of older people lament the fact that younger generations spend so much time online. They constantly encourage younger people to get outside and stop staring at their screens.
Rather than being proud of his son’s impressive follower count, this dad pointed out a deficit in his son’s life that we’re sure he’s only too aware of. Not a great parenting move.
Party Pooper
Ahh to be young and facing all the crippling anxiety of being a teen dealing with social situations. We don’t miss it. Who was invited to parties was always a contentious issue and this exchange brings back some painful memories.
We’re sure this guy will be flooded with party invites once he’s in college and then he’ll look back at these times and laugh.
Getting Schooled
When you grow up together, you know exactly what bothers each other. Siblings are often the people who know exactly how to touch a nerve.
This response from this girl’s brother to her Snapchat story is a great case in point. The sheer specificity of this insult is impressive, especially for a 14-year-old teen. For what it’s worth, we think she looks great.
Hard Truths
We’ve all called our moms by accident, but most of us are lucky enough to never have received this outrageous reply.
It’s a pretty hilarious comeback from this mom, but we feel like it’s pretty uncalled for in the circumstances. This girl should be more careful about any pocket dials in the future if she wants to avoid more unwanted revelations.
Milking It
People with allergies and intolerances have enough to deal with. From surviving restaurant trips to finding tasty alternatives, they deserve our sympathy, not our criticism.
However, this person didn’t even want to hang out with their friend when they remembered they were lactose intolerant. We’re intrigued to know what their plans were and why they were so dependent on successful milk digestion.
Hairy Moment
Hair is a sensitive issue for many guys, especially when they don’t have much of it left. Everyone knows it’s not a good idea to poke fun at a receding hairline.
However, this boy was adamant that he wasn’t going to wear a warm hat, and he was willing to hit his dad where it hurt in order to get his way.
Road Hog
We all make mistakes while driving and reactions from other drivers can be pretty aggressive. From being yelled at to obscene gestures, it can be scary out there on the roads.
This person faced something even more upsetting than obscenities and the commenter has nailed the reason why a thumbs down could be so upsetting. The “I’m not mad, I’m just disappointed” vibe always cuts deepest.
On Top
This guy was at the beach when a young woman approached him and asked if it was legal to be topless. I replied that yes, it’s legal in Washington for women to be topless at the beach.
However, she gave me a look of disgust and said “No, dude, I meant is it legal for YOU to be showing so much pasty white skin right now? You’re gonna blind someone.” We’re guessing he put his t-shirt back on pretty quickly after that zinger.
Captain Obvious
This Facebook user was just trying to do a public service in trying to reunite this greeting card with its owner. We assume they were looking for Molly’s surname, but didn’t express themselves very clearly.
One of their friends had no problem pointing out the obvious. We hope the card made its way into the hands of the right Molly in the end.
Toddler Terrors
Although toddlers can be truly delightful, they also have a way of knowing how to hit you where it hurts. Whether or not it’s intentional, it can still be a crushing takedown, even when it’s coming from a two-year-old child.
These toddlers had the perfect insults for their family members—from a low-blow hair slight to making an auntie feel thoroughly unwelcome. That’s got to sting.
Comedy Gold
Anyone who’s tried to sell anything online will know that people are constantly lowballing you, making offers that are way below the value of the item you’re selling.
Most people just choose to ignore these chancers, but this person took things a little too far. Sending someone all the way to the address of a comedy club is a pretty bold move. How mad would you be if you’d made that journey?
Busting Chops
Finding old childhood diaries is always an amazing (and usually hilarious) insight into how children see the world. We’re sure this mom and daughter had a great time reading her takes on the world as a six-year-old kid.
This entry is as funny as it is devastating and we love that the young girl thought it important enough to write down. We wonder if the mom’s pork chop game has improved any in the intervening years.
Grammar Police
Not using proper grammar can dramatically alter the meaning of a sentence and can result in some pretty hilarious misunderstandings. This girl was upset with her dad for not calling, but she wrote something very different.
When Chantelle pointed out she’d missed a comma, the OP wasn’t amused and let her know it. Chantelle had the sassiest comeback at the ready. We wonder if these two are still Facebook friends after this exchange.
Browbeating
Hair tends to grow in a lot of places we’d rather it didn’t. Between the eyebrows is a classic one and we know lots of people will relate.
However, one Reddit user decided to callously point out that the commenter probably has a unibrow. With 1.4K upvotes, it’s clear lots of people appreciated the joke. We hope the commenter saw the funny side.
Belly Ache
Explaining to your firstborn that they have a new baby sibling on the way can be tricky. It’s hard for toddlers to grasp the concept of a little human growing in their mom’s belly.
However, this guy’s daughter seemed to catch on quickly. She just assumed that, given his physique, her dad must be pregnant as well. Don’t worry Ed—dad bods are in!
Momma’s Boy
Some people wait for years to meet the right person. When they finally find the one, they’re keen to share it with the world. Unfortunately, there are always trolls waiting for the perfect put-down moment.
Insinuating only a mom could love their son is a pretty tired line. We’re just happy that the guy finally met the right girl.
Friend Zoned
Ahhh the power of avatars. We can use them to say things we might be too shy to say ourselves. This guy plucked up the courage to send a cute message to his crush and she found a way to make it perfectly clear she didn’t see him that way.
To be fair to her, she’s just openly communicating her feelings and there’s nothing wrong with that. Her male friend is staying in the friend zone and he’ll just have to accept it.
Kodak Moment
Everyone knows that your license plate photo is never going to be your best angle. It’s best not to be too precious about it and just accept whatever comes. But this is next-level humiliating.
Although she was pretty insulting and patronizing, at least the DMV lady gave this poster a second chance to take a better picture. We’re sure that her intentions were good.
“Rugrats” Roast
Moms are usually full of embarrassing compliments on Facebook, but sometimes they can decide to be brutally honest, with hilarious results.
We bet the kooky red-haired mom from Rugrats was not the look that this guy was going for, but there is definitely a Didi Pickles vibe going on. If she didn’t point it out then someone else would have done.
Dinner and Dessert
A quick Google shows us that everyone’s favorite Mexican-inspired fast food chain is no stranger to food poisoning cases, and let’s be real, we’ve all had our fair share of suspicious Crunchwrap Supremes.
However, we’re still sure that the restaurant wasn’t expecting this graphic response to their innocent question. It’s a little more than anyone needs to know, but let’s hope they take it as a cue to work on their food hygiene practices.
Judgy Judy
Judge Judy is known and loved for her sassy, no-nonsense attitude—it’s why we love her. The daytime TV star has more than her fair share of put-downs up her sleeve.
This insult is truly cold, and we’re desperate to know which unfortunate offender she said it to. We’re guessing we’d be running in the opposite direction as well.
Happy Childhood
Most of us have happy memories of childhood, but some people aren’t so lucky. We don’t know what went down in this family to result in this fictional killing-off but it must have been pretty dark.
Let’s hope this brother appreciates his sister in real life and just wants to add to the drama of his book. To be fair to him, it’s definitely got us wanting to read it.
Age is But a Number
Guessing people’s ages is usually asking for trouble, and everyone knows that you should generally aim lower rather than higher. This waitress probably thought she was doing something nice for the friendly ‘senior’ who came in for lunch.
People in their thirties already usually have a complex about aging and this could not have helped. But hey, at least he got a discount.
Going for Gold
Sometimes guys can be a little too confident and they need their significant others to take them down a peg when their ego gets the best of them. This guy was excited to share his plans for his Olympic-themed protection with his Facebook friends, but his partner had other ideas.
Shann’s response is iconic. We hope David got the message and became more generous in the bedroom.
Unfortunate Mistake
Some people love to take to social media to air their grievances and lord it over everyone else. This man decided the world needed to hear his strong opinions on proper grammar.
Unfortunately, he didn’t proofread his own post and ended up making a pretty glaring gaffe. We wonder how long it took for the OP to realize his mistake.
Soul Sisters
Comparing family members is always a risky game. You never know whether people will take the comparison as a compliment or not. But this person clearly didn’t mean this comment as a compliment.
We’re sure both sisters are pretty in their own way and we hope this girl didn’t take this person’s tactless remark to heart. Some people need to think before they speak.
Truth Bomb
There’s only so much grief you can give moms before they remind you of your origin story. Yes, they can work our last nerve, but at the end of the day, they did give us life.
This daughter definitely wasn’t expecting this sassy (and a little too graphic for comfort) comeback when she asked her mom to get out of her space.
Royally Rude
Toddlers don’t know they’re being insulting, but sometimes that makes their insults all the more cutting. This woman was just trying to be kind and play games with this three-year-old child, but they weren’t having any of it.
This post just makes us even more sure that we need to stop princesses from being toddler role models. Next time they should play knights in the castle instead.
Dear Daughter
Author Mat Johnson’s daughter has a very specific way of getting back at her dad when she’s mad at him. We love that he is so proud of her for her brutal revenge readings of his bad reviews.
We wonder if she’ll start writing 1-star reviews on Goodreads of her dad’s books when she gets really mad at him. Seems like only a matter of time.
Numbers Game
Parents have a way of making us feel rejected when they don’t even try. This mom probably wasn’t even thinking about how she’d make her fourth child feel with this comment, and yet she still managed to touch a nerve.
We’re sure she wouldn’t change Baby Number Four for the world, she was just thinking aloud. Still, not the best move there, Mom.
Choices
Some people plan to have their children, while some come along as a surprise. This kid thought they fell into the first category, but their dad didn’t hesitate to set them straight.
A little advice for parents out there: don’t tell your kids they were accidents even if they’re bugging you. A little white lie is cheaper than paying for their therapy later in life.
Feeling Faint
In this day and age, it can be hard to find ways to disconnect and be romantic. Stargazing seems like a great option, but the person they invited obviously wasn’t keen.
We’re not sure that feeling dizzy from low iron levels has quite the same romantic energy as stargazing. We say move on and find someone who’ll drink hot cocoa and spot the big dipper with you.
Spelling Bee
We’ve all heard that “There’s no I in team”, but this is a new one. Unfortunately, that’s because there actually is an “i” in happiness, although we agree with the sentiment.
This responder wasn’t so charitable and made sure to point out the OP’s unfortunate error. They will never forget to use a spelling checker before posting a Facebook status again.
Preschool Princess
Any moms of preschoolers will know that making yourself presentable is very low on your list of priorities. Getting your kids to preschool on time is hard enough, without having to worry about things like your hair and makeup.
However, this girl is not letting her mom get away with her scruffy appearance. Let’s hope the mom had some time for a self-care moment before pick-up time.
Blindsided
We all remember the pain of being an insecure teen—we constantly worried about our looks and moments when we felt confident were few and far between.
This girl tried to make a cute joke when she was feeling bold and her co-worker threw it back in her face with some extra insecurity for good measure. However, despite wearing dark glasses, Roy Orbison wasn’t even blind so the joke’s on him.
Gym-timidation
Don’t get us started on the unsolicited remarks people make in gyms. From offering to show you how to use machines to commenting on your form, it’s a Wild West out there and we keep our headphones tightly clamped on to avoid these unwanted interactions.
Unfortunately, this person didn’t have the necessary protection and had to deal with this heinous comment. Keep your thoughts to yourself, gym goers, even if you think it’s a compliment.
Face for the Radio
It’s an uncomfortable truth that the world of television is still populated by stereotypically beautiful people. Yes, diversity is improving, but it’s still a cut-throat world.
This person was told in veiled terms that they weren’t good-looking enough to be on telly and that’s gotta hurt. We wish them every success in their media career and we’re sure they’d be great on radio or television.
Freshman Fear
It’s true that one of the fun parts of going away to college is that you get the opportunity to reinvent yourself. No one has known you since you were an eighth grader in braces and you can be whoever you’ve always wanted to be.
This dad kind of made that point, but in the most tactless way possible. Let’s hope that this kid didn’t go off to college with a personality complex because that’s not a great place to start.
Ouch
Moms on Facebook are something else. They love to proudly post photos of their kids, even if their kids haven’t consented to the photo being publicly shared.
This boy was not happy with his mom’s choice of photo, but she was ready with a comeback that impressed plenty of her Facebook friends. As the third commenter has pointed out, he shouldn’t mess with his mom—she’s clearly got back up!
Beyond the Pale
All the pale-skinned girls out there know how much hate they get for their natural skin color. From being called vampires to getting pointed inquiries about their health, pale people usually have to field insults from all sides.
However, it sounds like this Uber driver made an honest mistake when looking for his customer. That doesn’t mean it hurt any less but hey, at least he could spot her in a crowd.
Talk Turkey
As if it wasn’t already alarming for someone to plan on cooking a 25-pound turkey in the microwave, this mom’s unsupportive response has certainly caught our attention.
We’re sure Abby has plenty of friends to come around and eat her turkey, but let’s hope she chooses a better cooking method or they might all be leaving with food poisoning.
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