The internet has many of the same, old tired jokes. Most of the time when you see a post, you know exactly where it’s headed. However, sometimes, you see something that makes you take a second look.
From weird to hilarious and everything in between, these posts start out pretty innocent before going to totally unexpected places. Prepare for some surprises!
Squeaky Clean
Parents love to record the achievements of their kids, and some even go as far as keeping a scrapbook of milestones in their children’s lives. This mom was so proud of her son for winning the “Cleanest Backpack” award, but not as proud as she was for his next milestone recorded on the next page.
We’re not sure he meant to tweet this for the world to see, but hey, we guess it’s nice that he felt comfortable enough to talk about his first time with his mom.
Sickly Sweet
There’s a lot to unpack in this tweet. First of all, do people really say “lady doctor” these days? We’re glad to hear that this patient could find something good in his worrying diagnosis but we’re a little concerned he’s missed the point.
Let’s hope he stops focusing on the flirting and listens to health advice and gets his insulin levels under control soon, otherwise, there’ll be trouble ahead.
Teacher’s Pet
We all know what it was like back in elementary school. If another kid in your class did something to upset you, it wouldn’t be long until you went running to tell the teacher.
However, this guy made an unfounded accusation which resulted in his classmate losing her recess for a whole week. We hope Jessica did read this tweet because his guilt’s clearly eating away at him.
Mirror, Mirror
We often look back at our past selves and laugh at our dated haircuts or bad fashion sense. We thank god we don’t look like that anymore but then catch a glimpse of ourselves in the mirror.
Maybe we can never be totally happy with our appearance so it’s probably best to just get on with life and not worry about it.
Third Ring
It’s a common thing to let the phone ring for a little while before picking it up. We don’t want people to think we’re just sitting around waiting for someone to call.
However, there are some careers which require you to answer promptly and this is definitely one of them. We will never feel the same way about emergency call operators again.
Spinning Webs
Lots of people don’t like spiders, but equally don’t want to see them die. Spiders are useful critters and just because we don’t want them in our home doesn’t mean we have the right to kill them.
We love this classic dad joke and we didn’t see it coming. Now we have the perfect image of two tech bros chatting away, but one of them happens to have eight legs.
I’m Pregnant
“I’m hungry” “Hi, Hungry, I’m Dad”—so goes a classic dad joke, used by dads all over the land. Now we love dad jokes as much as the next person, but we’re not sure it quite works in this context.
Having said that, this husband is about to become a dad, so maybe we’ll let him get away with it. His wife doesn’t seem to be quite so understanding.
Good Deed
During natural disasters, it’s heartwarming to see communities coming together to help each other. At least, that’s what we thought this tweet was going to be about.
Turns out that this guy doesn’t want to help out his neighbor rebuild his roof, he just wants to escape the noise of the construction while his neighbor pays out of pocket for the repairs. Not sure he’s going to get too many people supporting his GoFundMe.
Put Backs
Plenty of people want to seem like they’re balling and can afford whatever they want. However, the prohibitive cost of living these days means that we can’t spend money freely.
This mantra might be more useful for these thrifty times. You can see, like, and want something, but unfortunately, you’ve got to put it right back where you found it. Less fun but more sensible if you want to make rent this month.
Oh, Brother
The fights between parents and their kids when it comes to doing chores are never-ending, and maybe people will remember coming up with creative ways to avoid doing any housework.
However, modern technology means that kids today can take their laziness to new heights. Honestly, we’re impressed with this boy’s ingenuity but we’re not sure this mom will be when she realizes what happened.
Why So Serious
There are plenty of reasons why some couples just aren’t compatible. Different aspirations, personalities, or attitudes can all get in the way of true love.
This girl’s boyfriend decided she just wasn’t serious enough for him and in retaliation, she decided to prove him right in the best way possible. We’re assuming this pair is no longer together. We hope she found someone equally fun and silly.
Milking It
We all know that feeling when you’re holding your phone or your keys in one hand and a trash bag in the other, and you have to work super hard not to throw the wrong thing into the trash.
This is a similar situation, but unfortunately, this person got their hands confused. We can just picture the fountain of chocolate milk sloshing over the bed. Guess there’s no use crying over spilled chocolate milk.
Controlling the Situation
The remote deciding to stop working is one of the most infuriating things that can happen when you’re desperate to kick back with your favorite show.
That’s why it’s not surprising that we resort to some pretty violent methods to get it working again. There’s no rhyme or reason, but somehow all the remote needs is a good slap and it agrees to cooperate.
Alexa
Amazon’s Alexa changed our lives with her amazing hands-free virtual assistance. Now we can follow a recipe, check the weather, or listen to music without even picking up our phones or laptops.
However, with this ad for new Amazon glasses, we’re about to get a lot more close and personal with Alexa. Lil Uzi Hurt’s shocked response is priceless.
Toot Toot
The panic of letting one rip in a public place is like no other, especially if you happen to be in a quiet and respectful place like a church. However, at least if it was silent, then you don’t have to face the embarrassment of everyone knowing it was you.
Unfortunately, this lady’s husband was there to let her know that her toot wasn’t quite as quiet as she thought. The only good thing is it alerted her to the fact that she needed to update her hearing aid.
Big Brother is Watching You
We don’t really know what to make of it, but this sign definitely doesn’t make us want to visit this restaurant. Not only are we not allowed to take pictures of our food, but we’re also being taped for an unknown and possibly sinister purpose.
We don’t like to think what kind of crazy stuff goes down in this eatery that means that diners need to be constantly surveilled, but we won’t be booking a table any time soon.
Cover Story
We’re not sure which part of this post is innocent but it’s definitely twisted. This girl has clearly been cheating and wanted to invent an alternative explanation, but the cover story she chooses is truly horrifying.
Of all the things she could have come up with, we’re not sure why she chose to go with this one. We’re guessing the relationship didn’t survive long after this deeply disturbing exchange.
Bring Home the Bacon
Parenting is exhausting, and we can’t always understand our kids’ wants and needs. This mom thought her son was having a nice time playing outside and was demanding a very specific snack.
Unfortunately, he had actually just been begging to be let back in for 10 minutes, whether or not there was any bacon in the house. At least she’ll be listening to him more carefully from now on.
Death Wish
Well if that isn’t a dark and twisted route to “companionship”, we don’t know what is. Forget about swiping right on a dating app, just steer left a little too much, and bam, you’ve got yourself a bus full of travel buddies to accompany you to the great beyond.
We’re all afraid of dying alone but this meme got very dark, very quickly. We’ll never look at bus drivers in the same way again.
Ship Happens
Many restaurants playfully embrace puns in their names and usually, we are here for it. But this Thai eatery has chosen a pun-taste name that draws macabre inspiration from one of the greatest tragedies of the 20th century.
While we usually savor a good play on words, we might need an extra dose of courage and a life jacket to fully embrace a plate of pad thai at “Thai-tanic”.
Burger Queens
You never know what you’re going to witness at Burger King. The fast food chain is full of customers from all walks of life and it’s always entertaining to just sit and people-watch while you enjoy your burger.
This guy had a front-row seat for this unexpected altercation between the cashier and an unhappy customer. Turned out they had a lot in common after all.
Killer Moves
The homicide rate is truly shocking in some areas and it’s not surprising that some people are constantly attending the funerals of the victims. This poor guy has had to go to more than a dozen funerals just this year.
However, this Twitter user has realized that all the homicide victims have something in common and that it’s just a little bit suspicious. Coincidence? We think not.
Nice Guy
This guy probably made this post in the hope that people would praise him for being responsible and making sure this girl got home safely.
Unfortunately, he didn’t quite get the response he was hoping for. The reply makes a great point about women’s safety at parties, but we’re so glad that the original guy had only good intentions and that the girl was brought home to her mom.
Praise Be
Many people turn to God during times of distress and feel like he steps in just when they need him most. However, we’re sure this Twitter user did not see the reason behind her aunt’s gratitude coming.
Getting to avoid paying your rent arrears is definitely a reason to be grateful but praising God because your landlord died—now that’s pretty twisted.
This is the Wurst
Once you find your niche on social media, it can be very hard to break out of it to create other content. People have high expectations and they get mad when you don’t meet them.
While people love seeing this guy review the foods he eats in the shower, it seems that his life is spiraling out of control. Someone get this guy and towel and a dry plate of food and let’s get his life back on track.
Just Keep Swimming
From “A Good Plaice” to “The Cod Father”, Britain’s fish and chip shops are known for their pun-tastic names. However, this name took things to another level.
Unsettling those looking forward to a yummy dinner by encouraging them to imagine a gruesome variation of a beloved Pixar masterpiece is definitely a daring approach. Just don’t order the clown fish.
Apple of My Eye
Okay, this is one for all the tech nerds out there. Those in the Apple crew will know that messages only turn blue if both parties have an iPhone as then they can use iMessage.
Although this wife assured her husband that she was not a cheater, the recently acquired gift from her ex betrayed her. We just hope breaking up her marriage was worth it for a new iPhone.
That’s Heart-Core
Many people striving to lead a healthy lifestyle might focus their energies on trying to reduce their resting heart rate. A low resting heart rate is a sign of efficient heart function and better cardiovascular fitness.
However, this post took a dark turn. Let’s hope this Twitter user was joking, but in any case, someone should probably check if he’s okay.
Sleeping Beauty
When this Twitter user shared their idea of what true love really looks like, we’re sure they weren’t expecting the replies to take this seriously creepy direction.
Being kissed in your sleep when you’re home alone was bad enough, let alone being kissed in your sleep in prison. To be honest, we never want to be kissed in our sleep again after reading this.
Looking for Love
The rise of dating apps means you can present yourself in a certain light to make yourself more appealing to a potential partner. Some people choose to only share their good points, while others are more honest.
Kay here has decided to share just a little bit too much and we’re not convinced she’ll get many replies. Let’s hope there’s someone out there for Kay who’s undeterred by her unfortunate incontinence issues.
Good Try
Supporting kids living with diabetes is definitely a great cause, so we applaud the attempt of the organizers of this charity fundraiser Christmas Bazaar and Craft Show.
Unfortunately, the person who created the sign missed the mark just a little bit and created a whole new meaning. All those poor diabetic children better watch out. Hopefully, Santa can stop the fighting when he shows up.
Not a Purr-fect Solution
Adopting a shelter cat is a great way to give an animal a new, loving home and get yourself a furry companion. However, you have to be careful that your new pet is kept safe.
Unfortunately, this cat owner hasn’t been very successful in taking care of his cats and instead, has set up an involuntary coyote feeding program. We’re not surprised that his daughter burst into tears—we’d be crying too.
Hey, Batta, Batta
Hamsters are cute fluffballs that make great pets, but unfortunately, are often mistreated by their enthusiastic young owners. We can see why with adverts like this around.
Back Market needs to stop with this kind of irresponsible advertising, or at least take responsibility for all the battered hamsters out there. Although it may be the same weight, don’t use your hamster as a baseball, kids. It won’t end well.
Nice to Eat You
Veganism and vegetarianism are on the rise, meaning wherever you go, there are usually at least a few meat-free options on the menu. However, there are still people around who don’t understand why anyone would avoid eating meat.
This restaurant is clearly not a fan of herbivores and is not shy about letting their customers know with this hilarious sign that takes a truly twisted turn. Vegetarians: enter at your own risk.
AI Oh No
AI is changing the world and can do a lot of things more quickly, efficiently, and successfully than humans can. But, it still has a lot to learn when it comes to certain issues.
This sign to encourage social distancing wouldn’t have looked out of place in the 1950s South. We hope AI can be taught to recognize these glaring problems before it undoes 70 years of progress.
Amazon Crime
When we use customer support chats, it’s easy to forget that there’s a real person communicating with you. This person took the time to check in with this social media manager and things took a chilling turn.
There’s something about Vicky’s aggressively cheerful reply that makes us think that the response at the bottom isn’t far from the truth. It’s a dystopian world and we’re just living in it.
Ay Dios Mio
Duolingo is known for its bizarre sentences, funny storylines, and incessant reminders. If you don’t do your 10 minutes a day, Duo will hassle you until you find yourself repeating Spanish verbs aloud at 11.51 pm.
However, we didn’t know that Duo got so serious with the punishments. Lock your doors and do your language lessons, people because that little green owl is coming for you.
Important Grammar Question
Sending work emails can be nerve-wracking and we all want to make sure we sound smart when communicating with our colleagues. Many people turn to the internet to double-check their grammar before clicking send.
Therefore, we can understand why this person made sure to use the correct phrasing, even when sending what we can only assume is a rage-quit email. Professionalism matters.
Ruff Day
Having a dog on Christmas is a lot like having a kid. They come and jump on your bed to wake you up early in the morning, you can shower them with gifts and feed them little treats all day.
But this was not where this Twitter user’s mind went. We won’t be eating any dogs on Christmas, thank you very much, but thanks for the disturbing image.
Stolen Goods
With its grand columns and storied 270-year-long history, the British Museum is a truly British institution. Visit and you can explore two million years of history and culture.
However, it’s common knowledge that much of the contents of the museum were taken during colonization, usually without permission. Yes, it might feel British, but it might be time to give these treasures back to their rightful owners.
Finally
The world is not in a good place. What with natural disasters, pandemics, and dictators, it’s definitely time to shake things up. If the aliens were to take over right about now, we’d all be rushing out to greet them.
However, when they saw the state of the planet they’d inherited, we don’t think they’d stick around for long. Seems like we’ll need to solve the earth’s problems by ourselves.
Road Rage
There’s nothing more annoying than driving along and having someone tailgating, undercutting, and generally ignoring the rules of the road. It’s even worse if they’re driving a fancy car.
However, there are some vehicles that have every right to go as fast as they can and they belong to the emergency services. We did not see this twist coming so hats off to this Twitter user, but let’s hope he’s only joking.
Animal Lover
It’s a shame when people get stopped from doing a profession they love, but rules are there for a reason. It’s never okay for a medical professional to abuse their position and form a relationship with a patient.
It’s especially not okay if that patient isn’t human. This post kept us guessing until the last moment and now we are thoroughly disturbed. Thanks a lot.
Unrequited Love
It’s always difficult to have a relationship with someone who’s not as generous with their words of affirmation as you are. You can end up feeling like all you ever do is give and they just take, take, take.
However, if the male in question is only two years old then maybe we can let him off the hook. We’re sure he’ll be more forthcoming when he learns to string sentences together.
Feel the Burn
Therapy is a great way to explore your innermost self, exorcise your demons, and find coping strategies. Therapists recommend all sorts of exercises to help us work through pain and trauma.
Unfortunately, this therapist’s advice seems to have been wildly misconstrued with some very alarming results. Whoever printed this quote on the front of a journal has a very dark sense of humor.
Anything is Paw-sible
We want to shield our children from the realities of the world for as long as possible. However, some kids develop an understanding of what’s going on around them from an impossibly early age.
However, it seems that this girl’s level of sensitive perception and cultural understanding is off the charts, especially when we realize she’s not human. We know they say dogs are intelligent but this is something else.
Power Play
The nuclear disaster at Chernobyl is still a hot topic and its effects are still being felt today. However, the fact that it’s one of the great environmental tragedies of the 20th century doesn’t stop people from making jokes.
This one made us do a double take, and then we realized what was what. Haha, very funny, people from Chernobyl suffer from birth defects. It’s been more than 30 years, but we still feel like this is too soon.
Beary Funny
This Twitter user really nailed it with this one. It’s got everything we could ever want from a tweet: wordplay, a comedic sense of urgency, and a literate bear.
Imagine being held at gunpoint by a trigger-happy grizzly, and your only way out is a 280-character-coded message. That’s a hairy situation if there ever was one. Let’s hope someone rescued Dennis before it was too late.
Yass Queen
It’s always fun to surprise your other half—there’s nothing more romantic than turning up at the door with a bunch of flowers and a box of chocolate ready for a cozy evening in together.
This guy seems to have missed some important red flags, but we’re glad to see he’s so trusting. She could just be a sports fan who pees with the seat up—who knows? The guy in the closet is a little harder to explain away though.
Getting Schooled
Teachers can make you or break you. Sometimes, the encouragement you get from a much-loved teacher can propel you on your way to success. Unfortunately, the opposite is also true. Luckily, this Twitter user didn’t let his demoralizing teacher get him down.
Congrats on persevering through countless rejections and, err, celebrating the demise of that naysaying teacher. We’d hoped he would have published a book by now, but maybe this is the next best thing.
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