“Laughing Down the Aisle: A Collection of Wedding Jokes”


0

Getting married is a big deal, but it's also a time to have fun and make jokes about the funny side of it. They call it an "institution" because it can be a bit serious. If you're tired of all the mushy quotes about love and marriage, you'll enjoy these funny wedding jokes we've gathered. They'll make you the star of the wedding and the party afterward.

  1. 1

    Vip king
    1

    Marriage is when a man and woman become one. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one.

    Advertisements
  2. Advertisements
  3. 2

    Vip king
    0

    Marriage is love. Love is blind. Marriage is an institution for the blind.

  4. Advertisements
  5. 3

    Vip king
    0

    The best marriage advice: If at first you don't succeed, try doing it the way your wife told you.

    Advertisements

  6. Advertisements
  7. 4

    Vip king
    0

    My wife and I were happy for twenty years; then we met.

    Advertisements
  8. Advertisements
  9. 5

    Vip king
    0

    “A good wife always forgives her husband when she’s wrong.”

  10. Advertisements
  11. 6

    Vip king
    0

     “If you love ’em in the morning with their eyes full of crust; if you love ’em at night with their hair full of rollers, chances are, you’re in love.”

    Advertisements

  12. Advertisements
  13. 7

    Vip king
    0

     “I’m going to get married again because I’m more mature now, and I need some kitchen stuff.”

    Advertisements
  14. Advertisements
  15. 8

    Vip king
    0

    Don't make love by the garden gate - love is blind, but the neighbours ain't."

  16. Advertisements
  17. 9

    Vip king
    0

     “Marriage is our last, best chance to grow up.”

    Advertisements

  18. Advertisements
  19. 10

    Vip king
    0

    Marriage is all about give and take. You give, and she takes.

    Advertisements
  20. Advertisements
  21. 11

    Vip king
    0

     “One of the keys to a successful marriage is separate bathrooms. When he enters my bathroom sometimes I’m like, ‘Why are you in here?’ And he’s like, ‘I live here. Can I enjoy my bathroom too?’"

  22. Advertisements
  23. 12

    Vip king
    0

    “No, please, don’t eat me. I have a wife and kids. Eat them!”

    Advertisements

  24. Advertisements
  25. 13

    Vip king
    0

    “When a man brings his wife flowers for no reason, there’s a reason.”

    Advertisements
  26. Advertisements
  27. 14

    Vip king
    0

    . “My wife is a psychologist… Not only does she know when I’m being a jerk, but she knows exactly what type of jerk I’m being.”

  28. Advertisements
  29. 15

    Vip king
    0

     “You know there is a name for people who are always wrong about everything all the time… Husband!”

    Advertisements

  30. Advertisements
  31. 16

    Vip king
    0

    “What’s the best way to get your husband to remember your anniversary? Get married on his birthday.”

    Advertisements
  32. Advertisements
  33. 17

    Vip king
    0

    . “A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days.”

  34. Advertisements
  35. 18

    Vip king
    0

    Love is one long sweet dream,

    Advertisements

  36. Advertisements
  37. 19

    Vip king
    0

    “When a man opens a car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife.”

    Advertisements
  38. Advertisements
  39. 20

    Vip king
    0

    “In Hollywood, a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.”

  40. Advertisements
  41. 21

    Vip king
    0

    Why do married people often look so serious? Because they can't laugh at their own jokes!

    Advertisements

  42. Advertisements
  43. 22

    Vip king
    0

    . "Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go and live with a car battery."

    Advertisements
  44. Advertisements
  45. 23

    Vip king
    0

    I asked my wife, "Honey, will you still love me when I'm old and bald?" She said, "I do."

  46. Advertisements
  47. 24

    Vip king
    0

    My wife says I never listen to her, or something like that.

    Advertisements

  48. Advertisements
  49. 25

    Vip king
    0

    Why did the bride bring a ladder to the wedding? She wanted to get to the groom's level.

    Advertisements
  50. Advertisements
  51. 26

    Vip king
    0

    Why did the bride run away from the wedding? She wanted to see if he'd really chase her.

  52. Advertisements
  53. 27

    Vip king
    0

    At the wedding, the bride said, "I do." The groom thought she was talking about the shoes.

    Advertisements

  54. Advertisements
  55. 28

    Vip king
    0

    At the wedding, the best man said, "Can I say a few words?" The groom replied, "Sure, but don't say anything about my past relationships."

    Advertisements
  56. Advertisements
  57. 29

    Vip king
    0

    Why do married people live longer? Because they can't argue with their spouse if they're dead.

  58. Advertisements
  59. 30

    Vip king
    0
    1. “To get the full value of joy, you must have someone to divide it with.” 

    Advertisements
  60. Advertisements

Like it? Share with your friends!

0
Vip king

0 Comments

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Choose A Format
Story
Formatted Text with Embeds and Visuals
List
The Classic Internet Listicles
Countdown
The Classic Internet Countdowns
Open List
Submit your own item and vote up for the best submission
Ranked List
Upvote or downvote to decide the best list item