Funny Animal Jokes That Will Make You Laugh Wildly


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If you’re looking for a good laugh, this selection of our favourite animal jokes will have you roaring with laughter! Why do giraffes have long necks? What do you call a camel with three humps?

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    How much money does a skunk have? 



    One scent!

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    How do you stop a skunk from smelling?
    Put a peg on its nose.



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    Where do polar bears vote?

    The North Poll.

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     What happened when the lion ate the clown?
    He felt funny.



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    Why didn't the leopard enjoy playing hide and seek?

    Because he was spotted all the time.




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    What steps do you take if a tiger is running toward you? 

    Big ones!



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    Why do squid swim in salt water?
    Because pepper makes them sneeze.

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    What sound do porcupines make when they kiss?



     "Ouch!"

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    How do you raise a baby elephant?
    With a crane.

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    Why did the whale cross the street?



     To get to the other tide.

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    Why are fish so good at watching their weight?

    Because they have lots of scales!



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    How do people cook in the jungle?
    With a grilla

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    What happens when a frog's car brakes down ?
    It gets toad away

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    What do you get from a pampered cow? 

    Spoiled milk!

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    How long do chickens work? 



    Around the cluck!

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     Why couldn't the two elephants go swimming?
     Because they only had one pair of trunks between them.

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    What is a marsupial's favourite drink?
    Coca-Koala



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    Why can;t you hear a Pterodactyl go to the bathroom?

    Because the "P" is silent.

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    What are goose bumps for?



    To slow the geese down.

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    Why do ants never get sick?

    Because they all have anty bodies.



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     Why can’t you get pain killers in the jungle?
    Because the parrots eat ‘em all.

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    Why do wolves never play in goal?
    Because they're always making howlers.

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     How fast can a duck go?
     At a quacking pace.



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     What did the goose say when he purchased a new lipstick?

     "Put it on my bill please."




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    What do you call a hurt lemur?
    An indri.

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     Is a kangaroo able to jump higher than the Eiffel tower?

    Of course. The Empire State Building can't jump.




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    What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college?

     Bison!



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    Why did the kangaroo stop drinking coffee?

     She got too jumpy!

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    Why do wolves never play in goal?
    Because they're always making howlers.

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     How fast can a duck go?
    At a quacking pace.



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    What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?

     A pouch potato.

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    Why did the team of witches always lose their cricket matches?



    Their bats kept flying away.


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    What do you call a camel with three humps?
    Lumpy

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    How do you count cows?

    With a cowculator.

     




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    What runs around the forest making other animals yawn?
     A wild boar.

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    Why did the whale cross the street? 



    To get to the other tide.

  37. 37

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    Where are fish in orbit? 

    In trout-er space.



  38. 38

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    Where did the sheep go on vacation? 

    The Baaaahamas




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