Here Are 40+ Tweets About Bad Dates That Are Both Awful and Hilarious


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Here Are 40+ Tweets About Bad Dates That Are Both Awful and Hilarious


Dating can be a real challenge. Despite the many successful relationships out there, there are plenty of accounts of disastrous dates. It’s often said that you have to go through a few bad experiences to find the right person, but these first dates are so cringe-worthy even the internet is recoiling! Check out the most awful first dates ever and see if you can resist canceling all your dating apps.

Different Isn’t Always Better

It seems like this unfortunate man found himself in the midst of his date’s turmoil in her ongoing relationship. She seemed to have the belief that the other option was superior, but after sharing a meal with the man, she was convinced that her previous partner was the best choice.


Although we sympathize with the OP, we cannot resist being drawn to this love story where he clearly does not have the leading role.

He Was Playing the Game

This man must be very bold and courageous. Although his ability to attract women is impressive, it is questionable why he didn’t plan his dates on separate days.


We can’t come up with any other explanation except that he didn’t want to commit to one woman even for a short period of time. This shows an extreme fear of commitment that we haven’t witnessed before. However, we are impressed with how he confidently created his own rules for dating.

Have All the Desserts

In all honesty, this lady deserves to enjoy 10 delicious desserts, one for each pound that she believes she needs to shed. We firmly believe that she is already stunningly beautiful, and we are curious about the guy’s appearance who criticized her. It seems obvious that his self-confidence may be lacking, and this might explain our question about him.


While we desire that a similar situation won’t arise in the future, if it does, it is recommended that this young lady orders at minimum two desserts – one for consumption and the other to hurl in his direction.

Thanks for the Life Hack

The woman seems to be living in the future since she has an ingenious solution for getting out of a bad date that we could all benefit from. By doing so, she can save time and potentially make money by leaving early and compensating the waiter for their time.


We want to contribute to the excellent idea of this woman by advising to wear clothes during the first date that one wouldn’t mind getting spilled on by accident.

Keeping it in the Family

This is equally unpleasant and unlucky. It’s not surprising that they would be linked in some way, right? It appears that those two shared more things than they had expected!


We are relieved that they realized their mistake before going beyond kissing. Family gatherings are already uncomfortable without such incidents. However, it’s evident that they need more family reunions because they can’t even recognize their own relatives.

It’s Too Late for That

If someone’s tooth accidentally fell into our mouths while kissing, it would not be a pleasant experience. It would be a scary one that could even be described as a sadistic version of pillow talk.


It was considered courteous of him to give her a warning instead of letting her be caught off guard, but it might have been better if he waited until he resolved the issue before attempting a kiss. While he showed good manners, he lacked foresight.

Worst Third-Wheel Ever

This appears to be an uncommon scenario, where both individuals would likely concur that their first date was terrible. However, the good news is that the mother appeared to have a good time.


Although she may not be an expert in matchmaking, this mother appears very pure-hearted and protective of her daughter, making it hard to criticize her. It’s possible that the dating scene isn’t prepared for such endearing mothers yet.

Who Is His Ex?

Oh, the difficulties of being in a relationship in Hollywood. It’s hard for someone to move on from a past relationship when their former partner is a celebrity and constantly covered in the press.


However, it was quite wrong of that man to purposefully attend a movie in which the actress was featured. And, to take his partner along with him to watch it? It’s hard to express our disbelief. If his intention was to impress his date with the fact that he was romantically involved with a gorgeous actress, it’s safe to say his plan failed miserably.

Why Is That, Though?

Although we genuinely sympathize with this man, it does make us wonder what caused this woman to stop dating altogether after going on a date with him. We are curious if there was anything he did to discourage her from pursuing relationships.


It is evident that he is not aware of the mistake that occurred. Therefore, we presume that he is a well-intentioned and decent person, but it is possible that the perspective of his date is included on this list.

Talk About Planning Ahead

The majority of individuals desire clarity on their status with their dating partner and find it admirable when their significant other is open about their emotions. Nonetheless, some people also crave a sense of enigma and are intrigued by people who arouse their interest.


Maintaining a balance between two conflicting ideas can be challenging, and at times, individuals may unintentionally lean towards one extreme. In this instance, the person rejected the balance to a great extent, comparable to how Leonardo DiCaprio dismisses women of his age.

She’s a Fast Learner

In all honesty, this lady has fulfilled the request made to her. Her companion desired her to use the word “please” more frequently, and that is precisely what she used to exit the situation. It’s understandable why she did so and we can’t fault her for it.


The man’s approach of patronizingly explaining etiquette to a woman who is fully grown isn’t an effective way to secure another date, or even make it through the whole first date.

He Dodged a Bullet

This man could be considered very fortunate. He not only managed to drive through the snowstorm without incident, but he also escaped a potentially disastrous situation by being turned down by his date.


Although we acknowledge her belief that her date was thoughtless for being tardy, she should have inquired about the reason for his delay before departing. However, considering the effort the man put in just to attend the date, it can be presumed that she was at a disadvantage.

This Is Just Too Cute

It feels different reading this story now that we know they eventually got married. Their first date story is actually quite adorable, despite being a bit embarrassing. This woman found her wife’s quirky and whimsical personality to be charming and attractive.


It just goes to show that no matter how quirky someone is, there are always those who will love them for it. Let’s just hope that this woman knows what her wifey looks like now!

That’s Her Villain Origin Story

Every villain has an origin story — something that pushed them over the edge to become the antagonist they are today. Well, this date appears to be that woman’s story and we really can’t blame her for the cynical dater she’s become.


If everyone had to endure a date with this guy, it’d simply be a world full of anarchy. We bet he’s one of those guys who wonders why he attracts “crazy” women, not realizing that he’s what’s making them crazy.

Nan Was Probably Angry

Imagine being a perfectly happy spirit, doing ghost-like things, and then suddenly being summoned to witness a horrific first date. We’d be annoyed, to say the least.


As a helpful assistant, I would paraphrase the given statement as:

It would be unpleasant for us to witness our grandson ruining his chances of having a girlfriend, especially if we were in the afterlife. We can’t understand why he would pick a day to talk to his departed grandmother, but his actions might lead to him being haunted for his entire life.

A Meet-Cute Gone Wrong

This story could have made for a really good meet-cute but, unfortunately, it just wasn’t meant to be. Romantic comedies would have us believe that this initial hatred towards each other would fuel this couple’s eventual romantic passion and then everyone in the restaurant would spontaneously burst into song.


Regrettably, this encounter resulted in a highly uncomfortable evening and potentially, the OP may have some advantage if this individual attempts to issue another ticket in the future.

Accidentally Running a Charity

It appears that this poor guy ran an accidental charity! Well, there are a lot worse things in life than unintentionally doing a good deed. Here’s the thing — how did this woman know to sit with him for a free meal?


Our theory is that it was, in fact, the woman he was meant to be on a date with and she just wanted a nice dinner without needing to make small talk, so she sent that text after the fact.

There Are Places for That

Here’s what makes interactions like this confusing — there are those who work in an industry in which a customer can pay for intimacy. So why wouldn’t someone just go to one of those places, rather than take a person out on a date, if they just want to exchange money for physical favors?


Ironically, that woman may have been planning to kiss her date before he asked that question. Now, he’ll most definitely be going home alone and he’s out a decent amount of money.

We’re All Confused Here

Something tells us that everyone meant well here but literally, not one person had a clue what was going on. Clearly, the couple on the date was confused and each thought that perhaps the other knew the elderly couple.


Meanwhile, we can only assume that the elderly couple also thought that they knew these youngsters, somehow. We take this as a hilarious misunderstanding rather than anyone having ill intent. Even better, it’s a great story that both pairs can tell for years to come!

Well, It’s Not All Bad

This is perhaps the most innovative method someone has used to acquire a client. Although we do not condone the dishonesty, we cannot help but acknowledge this individual’s strong sense of determination.


Before feeling too bad for this woman, let’s keep in mind that a cute date is a dime a dozen but a decent mortgage rate is a lot harder to come by! We’d say this woman can consider that evening to be a huge win.

It’s a Solo Date

Evidently, the man had a stronger desire to watch the particular movie rather than spend quality time with his partner. Fortunately, he is aware of his preferences. In the spectrum of terrible dates, this one isn’t too bad.


The woman still got to see a movie and didn’t have to spend too much time with a guy it wasn’t going to work out with. It’s actually a pretty good strategy for a person who doesn’t want to be rude and leave a date early but they’re not having fun.

Not Enough Said

We disagree that enough was said here… we have a lot of questions and concerns. To be fair, this seems like an honest mistake to make but we can definitely see how it’d be a serious mood killer.


As long as this guy helped his date heal and stayed with her in the hospital (if needed) we’d say he deserves a second chance. Maybe she should do the driving on the next date, though…

That’s a Morbid Third-Wheel

We have come across several unpleasant situations where someone felt like a third wheel, but this particular instance seems to be the most awful. Although we acknowledge that the person seems unperturbed and fails to recognize the peculiarity of having a corpse in the car, it would be beneficial for him to empathize with his companion’s point of view.


Taking one’s work home with them is always frowned upon, but in this case, it should be straight-up illegal! We hope this guy’s next date will be a gothic woman who will appreciate her man’s dedication to his morbid work.

That’s Technically Not Cheating

We’re not really sure how we would react here. It’s technically not cheating if he’s trying to cheat on his date with… his date. Or is it? At least she can rest easy knowing that this guy truly does think she’s the most beautiful woman in the room.


He should probably work on drinking a bit less, though. A person doesn’t make that kind of mistake from just a couple of drinks and a trip to the bathroom.

How Not to Handle Rejection

This guy needs some serious lessons in how to handle rejection because he simply proved this woman right in not wanting him. Here’s the thing — men who get a lot of women don’t need to brag about how they have a lot of women.


We have no doubt that this woman feels she dodged a bullet. Had this guy responded in an appropriate manner, she may have even regretted her decision. Instead, he’s moving on to “the next one” a.k.a. his hand.

Um, a Little Help Here?

We completely appreciate this woman’s desire to be a strong and independent individual. That being said, she may have been a bit overeager here. There’s nothing wrong with letting a guy be a gentleman every now and then.


We hate to say it but it seems that this woman deserved her moment of embarrassment. Maybe next time, just let the guy do his thing? She can always simply tell him that she doesn’t like chivalry, that’d certainly be less awkward.

Don’t Drink and Text, Folks

Ah, the dangers of drinking and texting… one could easily end up sending the wrong message to the wrong person. Really, though — why was this guy texting while on a date anyway? We’re sure that the date he regretted was a perfectly nice guy.


After all, he still gave him a ride home after being insulted, didn’t he? We certainly wouldn’t do the same. Chances are, after posting this, the OP will have no problem finding plenty of dates.

Well, if He Was Hungry…

How was this guy unable to wait even just a few more minutes until the date actually started? The woman was early, after all! The one thing we’ll say in this guy’s favor is that he certainly knows what he wants and is a go-getter who marches to the beat of his own drum.


Unfortunately, he might be just a little too independent for this woman. Oh well, better luck to her for next time!

So… Is She?

He can’t have actually thought this would work out in his favor? Now, he’s lost both women. We feel like he’s seen one too many Mary-Kate and Ashley movies from the early 2000s, where they’re constantly swapping places on dates and stuff.


Dear random guy — if those sisters were to swap places on a date with you, they wouldn’t be fighting over who gets to stay. They’d be fighting over who gets to throw a drink at his face and storm out.

Who’s Really the Victim Here?

Something tells us that the OP isn’t the real victim here. How much younger is “a little younger” to him? Our bet is that he’s really closer in age to the grandma and was trying to creep on a much younger woman.


The fact that this girl didn’t even fathom he could be hitting on her kind of tells us that she’s nowhere near his age range. This is some perfect karma right here.

Four Reasons Why She Left

We’d like to counteract this list by making our own list explaining the four reasons why this woman likely left her date in the middle. 1) He’s superficial, evidenced by the items on his list. 2) He’s arrogant and just assumes that she’s interested in him.


3) He’s organized enough to make a list but not organized enough to be on time. 4) He’s giving some serious small, um, “package” energy. See? We can make lists, too.

If it Ain’t Broke…

We understand this woman being offended but we don’t actually think her date was that bad. What’s wrong with playing the field a bit? She can’t really expect loyalty and commitment from this guy before they even go on a first date!


That being said, he should really diversify and not take all of his dates to the same restaurant. We get that he probably has the logic of “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it” but, clearly, it’s broken.

It’s Official: Chivalry Is Dead

While we support the idea of gender equality, let’s resolve the issue of who should cover the expenses during the first date. Men are not subject to harassment while walking in public, they receive equal pay at work, and they have control over their own bodies without interference from the government.


What do women receive? A complimentary meal during a first date. It is probable that women worldwide would willingly exchange this for all the other things, allowing men to have the free dinner.

Nobody’s Perfect, Especially Not Him

Did you intend to compliment her? Our position is that he doesn’t deserve her because he focuses on her imperfections. His actions merely emphasize his own flaws and uncertainties. It would be equitable if this woman countered by listing his shortcomings. We hope she did.


Then she should have said, “You were right, I am too good for you,” done a hair toss, and walked away. We would have slow clapped her out of there.

Those Must Be Fascinating Sheep

This guy is clearly very niche and needs to find someone who has the same interests as him. There’s nothing wrong with having unique interests but maybe he should try to find his Little Bo Beep instead of wasting time looking for Cinderella.


It’s a bit cruel but we think, given what a terrible time this woman was having, she should have ordered the lamb for dinner. Just to see how he’d react…

Norma Bates, Is That You?

We would leave this date straightaway. Not even because this guy, inexplicably, brought his mother along. More importantly, he treated his mom like a dog and had her wait in the car.


We wish that he had opened a window for the woman, and we wonder if he had any intention of bringing her food. The atmosphere is reminiscent of Norma and Norman Bates, which indicates that it is necessary to leave immediately.

That Probably Wasn’t Tea

Okay, seriously, what was in that tea? His poor girlfriend probably wasn’t expecting that from just an innocent daytime tea outing! We bet the Brits would be proud, given that this guy has combined two of their favorite things — tea and getting wasted.


It is expected that the guy’s girlfriend has broken up with him and also hoped that the girl sitting at the next table declined to go out with him, considering the well-known terrible date experiences he has.

He Needs New Friends

This poor guy really needs some new friends, or at least familiarize his friends with his extended family. We hope that he at least got to enjoy a nice family dinner with his cousin. We doubt either of them will ever agree to going on a blind date again, though.


Especially not one arranged by this particular friend! We’ve learned our lesson from this guy’s unfortunate story. Before someone sets up a blind date for us, we’re showing them our family’s photo album.

It’s the Wrong Fairytale

This guy’s over here pretending to be Prince Charming when, in reality, he just wants to date The Little Mermaid. If he doesn’t want a date who can speak, then he should highly consider going all Lars and the Real Girl and just having dinner with a doll.


We’re also pretty offended, on ths woman’s behalf, that her being cute is “enough” for him. Is he enough for her, though? The answer should be a resounding “No!”

Good for Her

Good for this woman, knowing her worth and not putting up with a rude date. Eating pizza alone sounds like a way better evening than sitting through a dinner date with that guy.


We’re not usually advocates for wasting a perfectly good drink but this seems to be beyond justified. It’s not a wasted drink if it teaches an important lesson to someone who really needs to learn it. Kudos to the beautiful OP!

Mixing Business With Pleasure

We all know that people in MLMs are extremely pressured to sell and they can get quite desperate for new clients but this is truly a whole new level. We wonder if this method actually works and how many of his “dates” were just potential clients? Or how many clients turned into actual dates?


Something tells us that this poor guy is left both single and at the bottom of the MLM’s pyramid.

Um, Thanks for the Offer?

The fact that this guy thinks his date would even want his contributions to make a baby just shows how truly out of touch he is with reality. To assume someone would be grateful to have his children really exhibits an impressive amount of unearned confidence.


Our advice? He shouldn’t procreate for a very, very, long time. At least not until whatever head injuries he’s suffered from his athletic career have healed.

Did He Just Mansplain Feminism?

Let’s get this straight — not ony is this guy against feminism, but this guy actually just mansplained feminism to his date. Wow. We’re all for freedom of speech and expressing one’s views but he should really consider his audience.


The woman was simply responding to his question about her college and was not forcefully lecturing him on feminism. However, the situation ironically exemplified the necessity of feminism.

Marking His Territory

Our only guess here was that this guy tried to make a joke to cover up for the fact that he sneezed all over his date’s food and it just didn’t go over too well. Either that, or he’s got an extremely primitive way of marking his territory and letting everyone know that woman’s his date.


We have a feeling that the OP has had enough of this guy’s bodily fluids and he won’t be getting lucky anytime soon!

Sarcastic People Problems

Although we enjoy dark humor like anyone else, it’s important to recognize that there’s a proper time and context for it. It’s safe to say that making jokes of that nature during a first date would not be appropriate.


It can be assumed that making a joke about hiding someone’s body requires a close relationship with that person. However, there is a feeling that this individual could potentially appear in a Dateline episode. It is safe to assume that the original poster left the situation as soon as possible.


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